r2i forum

https://www.google.com/amp/s/qz.com/1218598/why-an-indian-girl-chose-to-become-an-american-woman/amp/


As usual was trying to google about my R2I woes,when I came across this article.

This actually shocked me as I was trying to imagine the guts she has writing against your own country.Confused coz I was not angry with her but actually proud regarding her freedom
of speech along with her picture.Never in a thousand years would some women like me have the guts to
express what she really feels about certain issues in a public forum.


While some of the point she may be true,I don't think India is certainly that unsafe provided you follow certain rules..now that may not be a problem with me as I don't care about driving in the night back home.India has certainly improved than the last decade.

As a woman,yes...certain things what she says might be true but this article could be a little overreacting...maybe?

Archana935;671655[....While some of the point she may be true,I don't think India is certainly that unsafe provided you follow certain rules..now that may not be a problem with me as I don't care about driving in the night back home.India has certainly improved a lot and what I see of the country now is quite different and safer than the last decade.

You are probably right.

Very often this type of comments/articles are provided by people to justify to self the decision or the action they have taken or propose to take.

You may have noticed that USA is also not as safe as people think. #MeToo movement has made hundreds of women come out. They are ones with guts. There may be several thousands (?or more as pre-marital sex is the norm) others that will come out in future and some may decide that it not for them yet.

In India as well there may be many that are ashamed(?) of themselves; ashamed for having been a victim; while the perpetrators roam at large.

I am fortunate that I am not in either position but it does make me sad. Women in my family and people around me are not restricted; there may be some self restriction that I am not apprised of.

But I do not and you should not let yourself feel disappointed in people making such comments. That way they feel justified and may be a little happier.
_________________________________
Ignoring facts does not change the facts.

I shared this article on the "General Banter" thread a couple of days ago. I don't think she is over-reacting. She clearly has had a horrible experience in India and does not want to be in a position to repeat it. If I recally correctly, she did not talk about her childhood so we don't know if her childhood was good or bad. The article starts with her going off to college in America and being bewildered by the new environment. At the same time, this new environment changed her and she had a hard time re-adjusting to India. This girl was so desperate to stay in America that she took the extreme step of joining the U.S. Army. So, clearly she would do anything to stay in America and that is the case with most immigrants, they risk life and limb to get to America and stay there.

In my experience, the two things you cannot escape in India are people and pollution. There are people everywhere and they all want to have something to do with you. They either want to dominate you or if you are powerful and rich yourself they want to become your bhakts. I cannot function like this. I only know to treat people equally and I can't tolerate Indians asking questions about my family and income. I also don't want to know about their personal problems and share my personal problems with them. Those are for my near and dear ones. I also don't want my movements to be monitored and reported to all and sundry. I exist and I want others to exist with each person and family going about their business without bothering others as long as no laws are being broken.

The things that I have not been able to adjust to in the West are the weather, food, flora and fauna, the lay of the land, the architecture of homes and public buildings, everyday objects, arts and crafts, clothing and the sense of belonging and being the dominant group within the society.

We all have to make the trade. But, for most people it is not a choice, it is a compulsion. They are either compelled to remain in India or compelled to migrate to the West.

The solution, as I have advocated on this forums before, is for English-speaking and Westernised Indians to have their country within the current boundaries of the Indian nation-state. There is no need for us to leave the land of our birth, just because Indians are primitive and don't leave us alone. Give us our own state or territory and then just leave us alone. The problem with India is that it is full of Indians. As soon as you get rid of the problem and you have a country that is free of casteism and primitveness, you shall have a land of the free and the beautiful. I don't know how many people like us exist in India, but there must be a few lakhs at the very least. We don't deserve the fate that the Indians have meted out to us.

Nothing wrong is deciding to stay in USA but what an over reaction from this girl.. She has too much expectations which will end up in disappointment later..
Looks like she is not really exposed to too many things yet and is unable to handle in real world. I don't see her continuing to handle challenges in the US.

i would go back to India if I have to leave my house at 3 AM and drive 100 miles for work..

whatisthepoint;671670Nothing wrong is deciding to stay in USA but what an over reaction from this girl.. She has too much expectations which will end up in disappointment later..
Looks like she is not really exposed to too many things yet and is unable to handle in real world. I don't see her continuing to handle challenges in the US.

i would go back to India if I have to leave my house at 3 AM and drive 100 miles for work..

Well put. She wanted to stay back and wanted to justify her decision badly. There is difference between, "I love America" and "I want to stay in America because India is a dangerous place".

Some people feel the need to put something down to elevate themselves.

From her blog it appears being deployed in Afghanistan battlefield is safer than living in Mumbai (a particularly safer city for millions of women. A city where there are no restrictions on timings women have to follow to stay outdoors, unlike delhi).

This girl is no different than the few lakh kids in her age group who are here from India and China studying UG in small schools. After UG ,they will join PG in any discipline that will help them stay here. If not for these students, 100s of colleges in US will have to close down. Some will find a job, others will marry to maintain status. It is the immigrant experience.

It is no different than many in this forum who came as PG students and managed to find their bearing after few years.

In this girl's case, her parents were trying to marry her off. So her only option is to stay away from India.

I don't generally comment here much but Abhinanda's monologue, no rant, really riled me up. Here is a kid (doesn't matter boy or girl) whose parents spent over $50,000 a year to send to one of the most expensive private colleges in US (see Bard college fees). With such a highly exclusive and expensive UG education, she couldn't hack it in a Master's degree program, which she took only to remain in U.S.? She had no passion for teaching and again took it up only to cling on to living in U.S.? Then later, out of desperation, she enlisted in the U.S. Army to become a citizen?!

This young woman has the arrogance to broad-brush an entire country based on one horrific episode? In fact, for people who come from such wealth (must be so, for her parents to send her to Bard college), India is the most comfortable country to live in - because every need and whim is catered for by an 'army' of support staff, domestic help and errand boys. India's rich rarely want to settle down in the US because they simply cannot or can ill afford to replicate their support system in India that gets things done for them without lifting a finger. Rich girls in India also go out late to party but have their driver/bodyguard to protect them and this girl would presumably be provided such support as well.

To cite the poor victim Nirbhaya's case as a reason to bash the entire country of India as unsafe for women-kind is the height of misandry. This is like citing the St. Louis shooting of an Indian techie to say U.S. is unsafe for all Indians who want to stay alive. Studies in India show that despite the domestic cruelty on women the media highlights, it is married men who die the most by suicides due to marital disputes, depression and related cases.

The last I checked, there are 6 U.S. military bases in Afghanistan, the most famous perhaps being the Baghram Air Base. Perhaps a 6-month tour of duty to this place to see how the Afghan women live will bring her to senses about women in India.

What's even worse is members picking such blogs/stories and justifying whether to R2I or not.

FlavourFlave;671657I shared this article on the "General Banter" thread a couple of days ago. I don't think she is over-reacting. She clearly has had a horrible experience in India and does not want to be in a position to repeat it. If I recally correctly, she did not talk about her childhood so we don't know if her childhood was good or bad. The article starts with her going off to college in America and being bewildered by the new environment. At the same time, this new environment changed her and she had a hard time re-adjusting to India. This girl was so desperate to stay in America that she took the extreme step of joining the U.S. Army. So, clearly she would do anything to stay in America and that is the case with most immigrants, they risk life and limb to get to America and stay there.

In my experience, the two things you cannot escape in India are people and pollution. There are people everywhere and they all want to have something to do with you. They either want to dominate you or if you are powerful and rich yourself they want to become your bhakts. I cannot function like this. I only know to treat people equally and I can't tolerate Indians asking questions about my family and income. I also don't want to know about their personal problems and share my personal problems with them. Those are for my near and dear ones. I also don't want my movements to be monitored and reported to all and sundry. I exist and I want others to exist with each person and family going about their business without bothering others as long as no laws are being broken.

The things that I have not been able to adjust to in the West are the weather, food, flora and fauna, the lay of the land, the architecture of homes and public buildings, everyday objects, arts and crafts, clothing and the sense of belonging and being the dominant group within the society.

We all have to make the trade. But, for most people it is not a choice, it is a compulsion. They are either compelled to remain in India or compelled to migrate to the West.

The solution, as I have advocated on this forums before, is for English-speaking and Westernised Indians to have their country within the current boundaries of the Indian nation-state. There is no need for us to leave the land of our birth, just because Indians are primitive and don't leave us alone. Give us our own state or territory and then just leave us alone. The problem with India is that it is full of Indians. As soon as you get rid of the problem and you have a country that is free of casteism and primitveness, you shall have a land of the free and the beautiful. I don't know how many people like us exist in India, but there must be a few lakhs at the very least. We don't deserve the fate that the Indians have meted out to us.

Own state or territory for western indians....seriously? So would the indian indians nows have to take a visa to come to western indians territory.

I have always felt india would be a better place when a lot of smart indian nris come.back. now i am thankful that they are not coming back startig their own little country.