Nadz : R2I to Hyd (Dec 2008) diary
Posted: Fri Mar 07, 2008 3:51 am
Hi all those who have returned to India, in the process of returning, contemplating return and those still wondering what to do!
I have been a silent follower of all the threads for past several months, after we finally made up our minds re: R2I.
I am a Consultant in UK, and have been here for the past 12 years, going through the grind and long winding training and the exams etc... My wife is a paediatrician. We have three daughters aged 12, 8 and 1 1/2 years.
As to the question why we are planning to return, I think I had always planned to go back one day, hopefully to be able to serve my own people (it does sound pretentious, but that's what the profession is all about, isn't it!) and be closer to my parents and parents in law. The one person who was always excited about my even mentioning the word - RETURN- was my mum. Unfortunately I lost her 2 years ago. On a "normal" day, I took my family out to the cinema, we were watching Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, and I got an SMS from my younger brother (who had already R2Ied to Bangalore from LA, being an IT guy and was snapped up by WIPRO in a senior position, but is now in the Gulf) informing me that mum had been hospitalised. Within the next two days I planned a quick visit to Hyderabad, but went on to stay with my mum in the hospital for about 16 days. She began to get better, came out of the ICU, and I returned to UK. 4 days later, there were complications and she was taken back to ICU, put on a ventilator, but we lost her on 25th September 2005. I couldn't even go back to attend to her last rites. I was so devastated blaming myself all the time for not staying back for a few more days!
Now what tripped the balance in finalising my return was this feeling of sheer helplessness that I went through one of the nights when I was in ICU with my mum, and the recurring question as to what the heck I was doing in a far away land, away from my near ones!!!
My mum had various health problems for a while and was prescribed sleeping pills which she had been taking for the past several years. The doctors in ICU decided to cut them down, because of a fear of compensating her respiratory functions. One night, at about 1 am, my mum whispered something through her oxygen tent. What I could barely hear was her request for a sleeping pill! My mum was my best friend. She gave me everything but never asked anything in return. She had never asked me for anything in my whole life!!! And here I was, trained to prescribe sleeping pills (some of you may have guessed my profession), doing it routinely as part of my duty here, prescribing all these pills to several women, even older than my mum, but totally helpless to give one to my own mum - my very best friend! And not give her one thing she had asked me for, in all her life!
The pain that resulted from my helplessness cut right through my heart. I have not managed to get that beseeching look in her eyes and that faint whisper, banished from my mind even today. That has indeed become my lasting memory of her.
I just don't want to be away from my family any more, and hence my plans to R2I.
I am fortunate in my wife sharing my views, and in fact pushing me into taking the jump! My oldest daughter is not so keen, citing her friends and school as her main reasons for not wanting to go back. But we are conditioning her slowly.
Not many doctors as yet have returned to India, but I have been benefiting and using all the tips from the immense and priceless treasure of information that's being made available, from other users of the forum. Many thanks to all of you. What I love about this forum is: there seems to be an answer to every question (well, nearly every), that too with a touch of personal experience, available on the forum.
I have just started the planning. I will try to keep you all updated as to my further plans and progress, since we are all in it together, aren't we?
Sorry for the tortuous and painfully personal introductory mail, but I felt it was very cathartic to me. Thanks for bearing with me.
Rgds
Nadz
I have been a silent follower of all the threads for past several months, after we finally made up our minds re: R2I.
I am a Consultant in UK, and have been here for the past 12 years, going through the grind and long winding training and the exams etc... My wife is a paediatrician. We have three daughters aged 12, 8 and 1 1/2 years.
As to the question why we are planning to return, I think I had always planned to go back one day, hopefully to be able to serve my own people (it does sound pretentious, but that's what the profession is all about, isn't it!) and be closer to my parents and parents in law. The one person who was always excited about my even mentioning the word - RETURN- was my mum. Unfortunately I lost her 2 years ago. On a "normal" day, I took my family out to the cinema, we were watching Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, and I got an SMS from my younger brother (who had already R2Ied to Bangalore from LA, being an IT guy and was snapped up by WIPRO in a senior position, but is now in the Gulf) informing me that mum had been hospitalised. Within the next two days I planned a quick visit to Hyderabad, but went on to stay with my mum in the hospital for about 16 days. She began to get better, came out of the ICU, and I returned to UK. 4 days later, there were complications and she was taken back to ICU, put on a ventilator, but we lost her on 25th September 2005. I couldn't even go back to attend to her last rites. I was so devastated blaming myself all the time for not staying back for a few more days!
Now what tripped the balance in finalising my return was this feeling of sheer helplessness that I went through one of the nights when I was in ICU with my mum, and the recurring question as to what the heck I was doing in a far away land, away from my near ones!!!
My mum had various health problems for a while and was prescribed sleeping pills which she had been taking for the past several years. The doctors in ICU decided to cut them down, because of a fear of compensating her respiratory functions. One night, at about 1 am, my mum whispered something through her oxygen tent. What I could barely hear was her request for a sleeping pill! My mum was my best friend. She gave me everything but never asked anything in return. She had never asked me for anything in my whole life!!! And here I was, trained to prescribe sleeping pills (some of you may have guessed my profession), doing it routinely as part of my duty here, prescribing all these pills to several women, even older than my mum, but totally helpless to give one to my own mum - my very best friend! And not give her one thing she had asked me for, in all her life!
The pain that resulted from my helplessness cut right through my heart. I have not managed to get that beseeching look in her eyes and that faint whisper, banished from my mind even today. That has indeed become my lasting memory of her.
I just don't want to be away from my family any more, and hence my plans to R2I.
I am fortunate in my wife sharing my views, and in fact pushing me into taking the jump! My oldest daughter is not so keen, citing her friends and school as her main reasons for not wanting to go back. But we are conditioning her slowly.
Not many doctors as yet have returned to India, but I have been benefiting and using all the tips from the immense and priceless treasure of information that's being made available, from other users of the forum. Many thanks to all of you. What I love about this forum is: there seems to be an answer to every question (well, nearly every), that too with a touch of personal experience, available on the forum.
I have just started the planning. I will try to keep you all updated as to my further plans and progress, since we are all in it together, aren't we?
Sorry for the tortuous and painfully personal introductory mail, but I felt it was very cathartic to me. Thanks for bearing with me.
Rgds
Nadz