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Indian culture and family values

Posted: Wed Mar 12, 2008 1:01 am
by layman
Often in this forum, Indian family values are touted denouncing the western values.

It is true that the divorce rates are low in India and mostly the norm is one man has one wife. But, is it due to our old culture? If you read old epics, except the case of Ram, most of the epic characters had multiple spouses/affairs including gods. Draupadi, Kundhi, Arjun, Bhim....When I visited some palaces in India there were 10s or 100s of rooms for king's wives. So, polyandry has been a norm in old culture. When did all this change? When did the existing family values come into place? A few hundred years ago? How?

I have visited palaces in Europe and I didn't see rooms for multiple queens. So, is it possible that the western system disposed the existing wife before getting a new one and Indian culture allowed cumulative addition. Could it be a reason divorces are popular in western world?

Indian culture and family values

Posted: Wed Mar 12, 2008 5:36 am
by cyberabadi
With Eliot Splizer news hitting the wires yesterday, I had to hear a earful about values etc and why are these woman (the wives) going thru this shit and standing with them at their news conferences.

I had to say 'polygamy' was the norm centuries ago in every culture. Look at Indian Mythology ... Mahabharata (Pandu & his 2 wives), Ramayana (Dhasaratha & 3 wives) and so on and so forth.

By my twisted logic.. I think polygamy was eradicated when governments started taking shape (some sort of elected representation centuries ago). These guys then decided that with everything being equal (50 men : 50 Women Ratio), if this was continued we would have plenty of bachelors who might die without a realistic chance of getting married.:)

Indian culture and family values

Posted: Wed Mar 12, 2008 7:38 am
by MrLong
This actually relates to a discussion in another thread, wherein, folks living in developed countries, are driven by their own moral/ethical values. As such, extra marital affairs are minimal compared to India.

And the moral/ethical values, along with 'taking responsibility' for your mistakes, keeps these people away from the normal crowd.

Whether we agree to this or not, infidelity is quite high in India (IMO, dont demand a proof).

Indian culture and family values

Posted: Wed Mar 12, 2008 8:10 am
by layman
cyberabadi;88007By my twisted logic.. I think polygamy was eradicated when governments started taking shape (some sort of elected representation centuries ago). These guys then decided that with everything being equal (50 men : 50 Women Ratio), if this was continued we would have plenty of bachelors who might die without a realistic chance of getting married.:)[/quote]
But, then electing governments and democrcy was not our culture? Was it? Our old culture is kingdoms. The vedas say kshatriya kings should rule kingdoms and kings are decided by birth itself. Democracy is a borrowed idea. Could "One man-one wife" also could be a borrowed idea?

Indian culture and family values

Posted: Wed Mar 12, 2008 8:43 am
by r2i_100
layman;87940Often in this forum, Indian family values are touted denouncing the western values.

It is true that the divorce rates are low in India and mostly the norm is one man has one wife. But, is it due to our old culture? If you read old epics, except the case of Ram, most of the epic characters had multiple spouses/affairs including gods. Draupadi, Kundhi, Arjun, Bhim....When I visited some palaces in India there were 10s or 100s of rooms for king's wives. So, polyandry has been a norm in old culture. When did all this change? When did the existing family values come into place? A few hundred years ago? How?

I have visited palaces in Europe and I didn't see rooms for multiple queens. So, is it possible that the western system disposed the existing wife before getting a new one and Indian culture allowed cumulative addition. Could it be a reason divorces are popular in western world?[/quote]

You will find example of polygamy only in Prince/Kings or elite class, mostly because they wanted to ensure "son" to take care of their throne, I guess common man did not indulge in polygamy even in olden days,.. I may be wrong though.

Indian culture and family values

Posted: Wed Mar 12, 2008 9:05 am
by dhanu
r2i_100;88026You will find example of polygamy only in Prince/Kings or elite class, mostly because they wanted to ensure "son" to take care of their throne, I guess common man did not indulge in polygamy even in olden days,.. I may be wrong though.[/quote]

Polygamy has been very common among common Hindus as well. In fact, several communities see number of wives as status symbol. Up untill 1956, a Hindu could have had multiple legal wives.



[quote]
Could "One man-one wife" also could be a borrowed idea?[/quote]
It most certainly is. Hindu society never had any restrictions on number of wives and neither does Hindu scriptures stipulate such a rule.

layman;88021But, then electing governments and democrcy was not our culture? Was it? Our old culture is kingdoms. The vedas say kshatriya kings should rule kingdoms and kings are decided by birth itself. Democracy is a borrowed idea. [/quote]

I don't think democracy was ever there in our society.

Indian culture and family values

Posted: Wed Mar 12, 2008 9:31 am
by cyberabadi
layman;88021But, then electing governments and democrcy was not our culture? Was it? Our old culture is kingdoms. The vedas say kshatriya kings should rule kingdoms and kings are decided by birth itself. Democracy is a borrowed idea. Could "One man-one wife" also could be a borrowed idea?[/quote]

I do not know about Vedas.. Are any of them against having more than 1 wife. I think, "One man-one wife" concept is a borrowed idea from the British legal system. Just because the majority have no specific law or book to base their beliefs on.

http://www.law.emory.edu/ifl/legal/india.htm#text

It would be interesting to see if any of the princely states (that acceded to India) were led by a person having multiple wives.


r2i_100;88026You will find example of polygamy only in Prince/Kings or elite class, mostly because they wanted to ensure "son" to take care of their throne, I guess common man did not indulge in polygamy even in olden days,.. I may be wrong though.[/quote]

There might be kings with multiple wives even after they had a 'Son' through a earlier wife (Ok, I don't want to quote the Pandavas as an example!). I guess the common man was more interested in where and how he earned his living.

Indian culture and family values

Posted: Wed Mar 12, 2008 9:39 am
by layman
cyberabadi;88038I do not know about Vedas.. Are any of them against having more than 1 wife. I think, "One man-one wife" concept is a borrowed idea from the British legal system. Just because the majority have no specific law or book to base their beliefs on.

http://www.law.emory.edu/ifl/legal/india.htm#text

It would be interesting to see if any of the princely states (that acceded to India) were led by a person having multiple wives.
[/quote]
That is what is confusing for me. On one hand we criticize western world for its values but going by the pre British Indian literatures and post British practices of our society, one of the basic pillar of our so called culture of "one wife policy" seems to have come from the same western society we criticize.

Islamic society criticizes western culture and still follows polygamy.

Indian culture and family values

Posted: Wed Mar 12, 2008 10:13 am
by super
It simply amazes me how people come with a set idea and try to fit all evidence to that. Have none of you ever heard of Lord Ram. In telugu we have a way to describe Him, Oke Banam, Oke Bharya, (One Arrow, One Wife). And Lord Ram is being worshiped as maryada purushottam ram, meaning the best among the men, whom men should imitate and worship. Doesn't it strike to you that this could be a factor in Hindus being married to a single woman for their entire life.

I see a pattern where some people have this idea that Indian ideas are inferior to Western ideas and India borrowed all good ideas from the west. I urge such people to read this research by Prof. Balagangadhara: http://balagangadhara.org/

Indian culture and family values

Posted: Wed Mar 12, 2008 10:28 am
by layman
super;88049It simply amazes me how people come with a set idea and try to fit all evidence to that. Have none of you ever heard of Lord Ram. In telugu we have a way to describe Him, Oke Banam, Oke Bharya, (One Arrow, One Wife). And Lord Ram is being worshiped as maryada purushottam ram, meaning the best among the men, whom men should imitate and worship. Doesn't it strike to you that this could be a factor in Hindus being married to a single woman for their entire life.

I see a pattern where some people have this idea that Indian ideas are inferior to Western ideas and India borrowed all good ideas from the west. I urge such people to read this research by Prof. Balagangadhara: http://balagangadhara.org/[/quote]
FYI, I have reference to Ram in my OP. Also, I think you are aware that Ram disowned Sita after her recapture and her life was not pleasant after her recapture