Decade in India!!
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post_r2i06
- Posts: 180
- Joined: Fri Feb 15, 2008 6:39 pm
Decade in India!!
Its been 10 years since R2I. Sep 22nd was my last at work in office. Flew back on Oct 5th... Just remembered today and thought I will post.
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post_r2i06
- Posts: 180
- Joined: Fri Feb 15, 2008 6:39 pm
Decade in India!!
10 years ago.. this week, I was doing final winding-up things.. I don't remember all the things I did/went through but one thing I remember saying to myself "OMG, when did I collect/buy all these things", I dumped so many things every day in dumpster till last day.. Didn't ship anything (lessons learnt from first R2I, as we had shipped things but never even opened boxes in India.) So, this time - throw/sell/gift everything, nothing to be shipped.
There was feeling of uneasiness, self-doubt etc BUT looking back, that much tension/stress/dilemma was unnecessary :-)
There was feeling of uneasiness, self-doubt etc BUT looking back, that much tension/stress/dilemma was unnecessary :-)
Decade in India!!
post_r2i06;638425Its been 10 years since R2I. Sep 22nd was my last at work in office. Flew back on Oct 5th... Just remembered today and thought I will post.
Congratulations on your achievement. It is an achievement actually considering that so few NRIs come back and so few manage to stay put for such a long time. It will be really helpful for a lot of people including me if you can elaborate on your experiences of the decade since R2I.
Regards
Decade in India!!
acothread;638491Congratulations on your achievement. It is an achievement actually considering that so few NRIs come back and so few manage to stay put for such a long time. It will be really helpful for a lot of people including me if you can elaborate on your experiences of the decade since R2I.
Regards
I guess your definition of NRI is a foreign passport holder, in that case.
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r2blore2009
- Posts: 29
- Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:25 am
Decade in India!!
post_r2i06;638425Its been 10 years since R2I. Sep 22nd was my last at work in office. Flew back on Oct 5th... Just remembered today and thought I will post.
Congratulations. A great achievement indeed. Would be nice if you could pen a few lines of the ten year journey.
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post_r2i06
- Posts: 180
- Joined: Fri Feb 15, 2008 6:39 pm
Decade in India!!
Looking Back year 1 was most interesting/challenging/painful. I'm not great writer, so will list few things.
Immediately after landing, had to take care of few things
1. Son: 1st grade to school. Admission was already done in April, so was joining school in Oct. We went and dropped him on his first day. jet-lagged, tired but trooper, handled it well. First day went off well. We were happy.. but soon it became difficult for DS. it was overwhelming and his emotions started to show. He would cry and was not willing to go. His main complaint was everyone shouts, its so noisy. And teachers loud voice, he was totally taken aback. We visited school/met teacher and explained them. Things settled down in 2-3 months. He finished his first grade as shy/quiet/intelligent kid. Made few friends in school and in apt. His US accent had vanished.
2. Daughter: 2 months old. We had to find pediatrician for her. Went to Sagar Hospitals, met doctor, vaccinations, ear piercing and stuff. Generally good health except for few bouts of cold/fever. Once (when 6 months old) rolled from cot and fell. I rushed from office, took to hospital, nothing serious.
3. Wife: (In Kannada - BaaNanti, not sure equivalent word in Hindi/English for mom just after baby’s birth).With 2 month old daughter, was exhausting for her. Had to see doctor for her care. Our parents and in-laws helped her through post-delivery care. BTW - they did not come to US for child delivery. With help of friends, we took care for 2 months. Because of her health, she could not come out for shopping of various things ( furniture/fridge/washing machine etc).. All of my(and dad's) choice, all of you can guess what happened to our house!! Hoz-poz, mish-mash of colours/models/non-coordinated stuff. BUT, she was ok with it, except for refrigerator. The model we had got was smaller than what was in her mind. So, had to return it and get bigger one.
4. House: Own apt, was new. So had to be furnished. Did that to best of my ability. But in 2006 - e-tailng/Google maps etc were not much of main stream. So, every task was a TASK. Had to search for shop, go in (w/o having done any prior research) and buy. They deliver after couple of days etc. It was pain for a month or so. Then all fine.
4. Driving: Had Santro/manual(big mistake). Driving in Bangalore, without knowing exact route (and without smart phone/maps!) was challenge. Couple of road-age incidents. Every time, I took car out, there was some or other event. Very soon realized, no point in arguing with anyone or get frustrated.
5 Work:
a. I had offer before coming back, from a company that I (or any of my friends) hadn't heard of. Anyway, joined them. On the day of joining, my gut was saying, mistake, mistake, abort, abort!.. but went ahead anyways.
{Lesson: Listen to your gut/intuition}. Soon, it became clear, it was not right. Bailed out after 3 months. Without job in hand {Lesson: don’t resign without job lined up}.
b. Luckily - got two offers in 2 weeks. One from very big MNC, another slightly smaller MNC. Based on experience with smaller companies, and gut feeling, accepted big MNC offer.{Lesson: Don’t always listen to gut/intuition!!}
That decision was worst decision of my entire life. Did not know about bench/billable resource/non-billable resource etc. etc. 8 months of hell ensued. Everyone around me (parents, wife, kid , friends) noticed my pain, and was out of water. It was terrible. Everyone, was like get out of it. Continuing there would have been harmful for my health. So resigned. Looking back, I think, nothing wrong with company , its my inability to become one in million, be anonymous and not expect too much. Just like- the way I adjusted to driving conditions, should have adjusted to working conditions..
c. But anyways... Meanwhile - in Mar, my previous US employer, had asked if I could work for them from India!! I had refused, thinking I would fine in big MNC. But after I resigned, and last day approaching, contacted them back, they said YES!!!. So started working for them, within year of leaving!!.
6. Health: Reasonably good health. Few episodes of cold/fever(for each of family member). One food poison episode(that was me, eating in office canteen).
7. On social side: Met lots of relatives. Had to attend funeral of 10 day infant. Very sad.
So, end of year 1 - everything was fine/settled except my job/career.
Immediately after landing, had to take care of few things
1. Son: 1st grade to school. Admission was already done in April, so was joining school in Oct. We went and dropped him on his first day. jet-lagged, tired but trooper, handled it well. First day went off well. We were happy.. but soon it became difficult for DS. it was overwhelming and his emotions started to show. He would cry and was not willing to go. His main complaint was everyone shouts, its so noisy. And teachers loud voice, he was totally taken aback. We visited school/met teacher and explained them. Things settled down in 2-3 months. He finished his first grade as shy/quiet/intelligent kid. Made few friends in school and in apt. His US accent had vanished.
2. Daughter: 2 months old. We had to find pediatrician for her. Went to Sagar Hospitals, met doctor, vaccinations, ear piercing and stuff. Generally good health except for few bouts of cold/fever. Once (when 6 months old) rolled from cot and fell. I rushed from office, took to hospital, nothing serious.
3. Wife: (In Kannada - BaaNanti, not sure equivalent word in Hindi/English for mom just after baby’s birth).With 2 month old daughter, was exhausting for her. Had to see doctor for her care. Our parents and in-laws helped her through post-delivery care. BTW - they did not come to US for child delivery. With help of friends, we took care for 2 months. Because of her health, she could not come out for shopping of various things ( furniture/fridge/washing machine etc).. All of my(and dad's) choice, all of you can guess what happened to our house!! Hoz-poz, mish-mash of colours/models/non-coordinated stuff. BUT, she was ok with it, except for refrigerator. The model we had got was smaller than what was in her mind. So, had to return it and get bigger one.
4. House: Own apt, was new. So had to be furnished. Did that to best of my ability. But in 2006 - e-tailng/Google maps etc were not much of main stream. So, every task was a TASK. Had to search for shop, go in (w/o having done any prior research) and buy. They deliver after couple of days etc. It was pain for a month or so. Then all fine.
4. Driving: Had Santro/manual(big mistake). Driving in Bangalore, without knowing exact route (and without smart phone/maps!) was challenge. Couple of road-age incidents. Every time, I took car out, there was some or other event. Very soon realized, no point in arguing with anyone or get frustrated.
5 Work:
a. I had offer before coming back, from a company that I (or any of my friends) hadn't heard of. Anyway, joined them. On the day of joining, my gut was saying, mistake, mistake, abort, abort!.. but went ahead anyways.
{Lesson: Listen to your gut/intuition}. Soon, it became clear, it was not right. Bailed out after 3 months. Without job in hand {Lesson: don’t resign without job lined up}.
b. Luckily - got two offers in 2 weeks. One from very big MNC, another slightly smaller MNC. Based on experience with smaller companies, and gut feeling, accepted big MNC offer.{Lesson: Don’t always listen to gut/intuition!!}
That decision was worst decision of my entire life. Did not know about bench/billable resource/non-billable resource etc. etc. 8 months of hell ensued. Everyone around me (parents, wife, kid , friends) noticed my pain, and was out of water. It was terrible. Everyone, was like get out of it. Continuing there would have been harmful for my health. So resigned. Looking back, I think, nothing wrong with company , its my inability to become one in million, be anonymous and not expect too much. Just like- the way I adjusted to driving conditions, should have adjusted to working conditions..
c. But anyways... Meanwhile - in Mar, my previous US employer, had asked if I could work for them from India!! I had refused, thinking I would fine in big MNC. But after I resigned, and last day approaching, contacted them back, they said YES!!!. So started working for them, within year of leaving!!.
6. Health: Reasonably good health. Few episodes of cold/fever(for each of family member). One food poison episode(that was me, eating in office canteen).
7. On social side: Met lots of relatives. Had to attend funeral of 10 day infant. Very sad.
So, end of year 1 - everything was fine/settled except my job/career.
Decade in India!!
Nice write-up OP, I guess, I am in the same stage of life now that you were 10 yrs ago. Completed 7 years in Singapore. I am from Bangalore too. I am 37yrs old and my daughter is in LKG now. No plans though for 2nd child, as of now.
Careerwise I also see similar problems for me. I will try not to work for big services companies or niche small companies. I will try to work for large captive banks in Bangalore like SocGen, ANZ etc if I go back to Bangalore. I have saved enough so that we can lead a frugal life, without pressure on money, so my approach to career will spending 8hrs in office without too much pressure.
Sent from my Redmi Note 2 using Tapatalk
Careerwise I also see similar problems for me. I will try not to work for big services companies or niche small companies. I will try to work for large captive banks in Bangalore like SocGen, ANZ etc if I go back to Bangalore. I have saved enough so that we can lead a frugal life, without pressure on money, so my approach to career will spending 8hrs in office without too much pressure.
Sent from my Redmi Note 2 using Tapatalk
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post_r2i06
- Posts: 180
- Joined: Fri Feb 15, 2008 6:39 pm
Decade in India!!
@wd40 - Wish you all the best with your plan..
Decade in India!!
nice post OP...These posts will help us in our planning and execution of R2I
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post_r2i06
- Posts: 180
- Joined: Fri Feb 15, 2008 6:39 pm
Decade in India!!
I did mention in one of other posts that being in India exposes you to deaths and funerals. While in US - we hear over phone the bad news and can't really fully comprehend what death is/means....
In last 1 year - came across following events
1. My friend visited India, had great time. Went back to SFO. When he landed, phone rang. He flew back in same flight.. for funeral of his father.
2. My colleague visited India, she helped her mom during chemo. Went back after a month or so. Within one week, had to return for funeral
3. My friend visited in Jan, his father(and my teacher too) was kind of week but all was well. My friend spent every minute possible with his dad. Went back, May 1st phone call, rushed home. Father was admitted to hospital, took care of him, was discharged.. my friend went back. May 31st, another distress call, rushed back. This time father passed away. Only good thing, was father could recognize, before slipping into coma and passing away, surrounded by family.
4. My aunt passed away in March. I got phone call, reached there in 8 hrs, already was in hospital.. 4 days in hospital, insisted that she be not poked any more and discharge from hospital and then within 12 hrs of being out of hospital, passed away.
I am sure there are tons of such incidents. I don't know why I am posting this but was kind of very distressing for me and thought sharing will reduce the feeling.
One thing, I observed is - in India, there isn't much of "end-stage" care. There is no concept of comfort-care. We try to save/fight disease till end, that some times causes even more pain.
In last 1 year - came across following events
1. My friend visited India, had great time. Went back to SFO. When he landed, phone rang. He flew back in same flight.. for funeral of his father.
2. My colleague visited India, she helped her mom during chemo. Went back after a month or so. Within one week, had to return for funeral
3. My friend visited in Jan, his father(and my teacher too) was kind of week but all was well. My friend spent every minute possible with his dad. Went back, May 1st phone call, rushed home. Father was admitted to hospital, took care of him, was discharged.. my friend went back. May 31st, another distress call, rushed back. This time father passed away. Only good thing, was father could recognize, before slipping into coma and passing away, surrounded by family.
4. My aunt passed away in March. I got phone call, reached there in 8 hrs, already was in hospital.. 4 days in hospital, insisted that she be not poked any more and discharge from hospital and then within 12 hrs of being out of hospital, passed away.
I am sure there are tons of such incidents. I don't know why I am posting this but was kind of very distressing for me and thought sharing will reduce the feeling.
One thing, I observed is - in India, there isn't much of "end-stage" care. There is no concept of comfort-care. We try to save/fight disease till end, that some times causes even more pain.