R2I: Stories of un/successful convincing Wife/Husband who were againt R2I

[mate4all]

1. Could users please share theirs/others TRUE story on how they tried to convince wife/husband on moving to India?
2. What was the outcome?
3. Some good tips?

I have been trying to convince for last one year but Wifey doesn't want to move/try India?
She's happy to leave me but NO India :e

Background:
Wife-Housewife, wife family in US, Two kids (under 3), Hubby (me-40) good job in US, I don't have any family in US.
In US for 8 years away from India for 10 years.

Not able to concentrate at work or after work, this constant kidda of moving keeps getting stronger.

I know life will be little difficult, dirty, unorganized and stressful in India but my inner feelings tells me it will be much colorful and less monotonous than USA. Kids will have grandparents/cousins close by also want them to have similar childhood memories what we got with friends.

We don't have any immigration problem nor financial problem here or in India. We are typical middle class as they call us.

I'm ready to do whatever it takes to make her move but somehow she's not convinced. Her argument is life/career for kids will be better in USA which I don't disagree but you don't know what future brings.

Been thinking to visit psychiatrist to verify I'm not clinically depressed, jus in case.

[FlavourFlave]

Move to India and have fun. That's all I can say. No point reading cautionary tales because you are dying of depression in the West and the only cure for that is India.

Life in cities will be difficult, stressful and polluted. Is there any way you can quit work and move to somewhere calm and peaceful?

This is the article I like recommending to people in your situation: https://www.cntraveller.in/story/how-move-goa-part-1/

[wd40]

From what I read, I don't see very strong reasons from your end to move. Your wife seems to be staunchly against it. In scenarios like this, status quo is the best option.

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[PeterGriffin]

1. Could users please share theirs/others TRUE story on how they tried to convince wife/husband on moving to India?
[/quote]
Have you thought about being convinced to stay here? These decisions to R2I/R2A are mostly emotional. Calling a place home is based on how that place treats you, the memories that you create, the equality and freedom that you enjoy as well as sense of security that you get. If the feeling is not in sync between you and your wife, there's no point in forcing the opinion.

Been thinking to visit psychiatrist to verify I'm not clinically depressed, jus in case.

From your post, you could be confusing an early mid-life crisis (MLC) to depression. We, are so fortunate that we have time to ponder on MLC. Most people in the lower economic strata don't even know that they went through MLC. So, count your blessings and have an open conversation with your wife. Whatever decision you take, live it and enjoy it!

[returning_indian]

Try projecting it as a temporary move to enjoy India for few years and then come back. Maybe that will open up the possibility. Extended stay can also let both of you evaluate what India has to offer. Plus kids are small so you have 3 years before serious education starts.

[mate4all]

Try projecting it as a temporary move to enjoy India for few years and then come back. Maybe that will open up the possibility. Extended stay can also let both of you evaluate what India has to offer. Plus kids are small so you have 3 years before serious education starts.

Thank you @returning_indian, @peter.. @wd.. for all comments.

I did offered temporary/testing for couple of years and if we don't like after two years then return back without any questions.

@PeterGriffin.. my heart and mind is convinced to return so it's hard to convince staying back unless we have atleast tried once and we knew it didn't worked.

I strongly feels it will be more hectic and less money but definitely worth trying R2I once in life before retiring.

It looks like a dead lock now that's why I was trying to know how users have handle it and what more they can suggest.

[Archana935]

http://www.r2icorner.com/2009/10/100-reasons-to-return-to-india-r2i.html?m=1

well above could be right..still am not able to convince my husband

[poofygoogle]

http://www.r2icorner.com/2009/10/100-reasons-to-return-to-india-r2i.html?m=1

well above could be right..still am not able to convince my husband

Thanks for the link. A very interesting blog...

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[wd40]

Thank you @returning_indian, @peter.. @wd.. for all comments.

I did offered temporary/testing for couple of years and if we don't like after two years then return back without any questions.

@PeterGriffin.. my heart and mind is convinced to return so it's hard to convince staying back unless we have atleast tried once and we knew it didn't worked.

I strongly feels it will be more hectic and less money but definitely worth trying R2I once in life before retiring.

It looks like a dead lock now that's why I was trying to know how users have handle it and what more they can suggest.

Somebody has to compromise. From what you describe your wife, she is an independent woman with a strong mind. So I don't see how you can convince her. It is like for example my wife telling me, let's go to New Zealand and if it doesn't work let's comeback. My reply will be why should I uproot everything and go and try something. Every thing is fine here, so status quo is the natural thing. If you want to try something new, please go ahead and try it yourself. I am not onboard. You can replace New Zealand with India, and it makes no difference.

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[desi4ever]

http://www.r2icorner.com/2009/10/100-reasons-to-return-to-india-r2i.html?m=1

well above could be right..still am not able to convince my husband

Among many blogs, I read that blog before I R2Id. I didnt a single R2A blog when I decided to move back( Now I wonder why ) ..Its a nice blog highlighting the pros of moving to India. Your experience may vary!