Life in US v/s India

dheeraj_handa · Post by **dheeraj_handa** » Thu Jan 24, 2008 1:14 am

Like me I know many may be having these questions whether live in US or India, if US then how many years, when we think of India we think of population, pollution, bad mentality people and I have seen when we Indians generally think of US we just see posistive sides of US, Dollars, good traffic but we ignore many other negative aspects,

However we need to think long term whether its India or US and both looks scary to me, in their own ways. no definite answers

Also we Indians are never United whether we are In India or outside, we see ourself as South Indian, North Indiann, Telugu only being friends with Telugu , Gujarati with a Gujarati, Tamil with a Tamil, Language itself is a barrier as without English we Indians cannot communicate with more than half of educated Indians. We need to today or later remove this language and other basis as barrier and unite strongly , for much more benefits that can be derived otherwise from not being limited to our own community.

Moreover I think this is just first generation of IT migrants who have kids born and brought up in US,. once we die and our kids have their kids , they would not even be able to relate themself with India any more and they would just be as isolated in this world as other Americans. though there can be some exceptions but that too would fade away with passing generations.

Kya Khoya Kya Paya , nazar nahi aaya

Truelydecent · Post by **Truelydecent** » Thu Jan 24, 2008 1:33 am

I agree ...all issues are for the first generation immigrants. Our kids won't be on the R2I forum.

Rajram · Post by **Rajram** » Thu Jan 24, 2008 2:00 am

dheeraj_handa;74909
Moreover I think this is just first generation of IT migrants who have kids born and brought up in US,. once we die and our kids have their kids , they would not even be able to relate themself with India any more and they would just be as isolated in this world as other americans. though there can be some exceptions but that too would fade away with passing generations.

Kya Khoya Kya Paya , nazar nahi aaya[/quote]
Don't worry, our kids will also have to deal with offshore teams when they start working, they will get a taste of Indian standards.

rk888 · Post by **rk888** » Thu Jan 24, 2008 2:25 am

dheeraj_handa;74909Like me I know many may be having this questions whether live in US or India, if US then how many years, when we think of India we think of population, pollution, bad mentality people and I have seen when we Indians generally think of US we just see posistive sides of US, Dollars, good traffic but we ignore many other aspects, Also we Indians are never United whether we are In India or outside,
'

However we need to think long term whether its India or US and both looks scary to me, in their own ways. no definite answers

Moreover I think this is just first generation of IT migrants who have kids born and brought up in US,. once we die and our kids have their kids , they would not even be able to relate themself with India any more and they would just be as isolated in this world as other americans. though there can be some exceptions but that too would fade away with passing generations.

Kya Khoya Kya Paya , nazar nahi aaya[/quote]

I am sure that my life will be much better in India. . I am not bothered about
pollution, corruption, gundagri...dadagiri..etc..in India.....for me those are secondary..... I can't live this lonely life anymore in US..... I will R2I in next couple of years..

nags2000 · Post by **nags2000** » Thu Jan 24, 2008 3:07 am

I believe kids should first learn to know what is sharing, what is love, what is respect and spirituality. These are all the base of life.

In the early years, kids learn by doing and watching. For eg. kids who watch their parents pray everyday and donating money to temple will grow as part of it. kids who watch parents brushing twice will grow as part of it. kids who watch their parents showing respect to their grand parents will grow as part of it. kids who watch parents blessing other kids and giving them gifts will grow as part of it. kids who watch parents doing charity will learn humanity. they will know sharing. These are all very crucial during the early stages of life and so on.

Once the base is set strongly kids can grow anywhere and still be themselves without any external pressure. For very practical reasons, for the 2nd generation kids, i think growing up in india during their early stages ( say till 15 or 16 ) and then say R2A will be the correct thing. For 3rd generation ( like our grand kids ) hopefully it should not be an issue since the 1st generation ( like us ) and 2nd generation ( like our kids ) might have built the necessary foundation for them to grow up naturally with all these qualities.

Did I sound too philosophical :)

dheeraj_handa · Post by **dheeraj_handa** » Thu Jan 24, 2008 6:32 am

rk888;74933I am sure that my life will be much better in India. . I am not bothered about
pollution, corruption, gundagri...dadagiri..etc..in India.....for me those are secondary..... I can't live this lonely life anymore in US..... I will R2I in next couple of years..

yes I agree with you , i wish you all the best,

dheeraj_handa · Post by **dheeraj_handa** » Thu Jan 24, 2008 6:35 am

nags2000;74954I believe kids should first learn to know what is sharing, what is love, what is respect and spirituality. These are all the base of life.

In the early years, kids learn by doing and watching. For eg. kids who watch their parents pray everyday and donating money to temple will grow as part of it. kids who watch parents brushing twice will grow as part of it. kids who watch their parents showing respect to their grand parents will grow as part of it. kids who watch parents blessing other kids and giving them gifts will grow as part of it. kids who watch parents doing charity will learn humanity. they will know sharing. These are all very crucial during the early stages of life and so on.

Once the base is set strongly kids can grow anywhere and still be themselves without any external pressure. For very practical reasons, for the 2nd generation kids, i think growing up in india during their early stages ( say till 15 or 16 ) and then say R2A will be the correct thing. For 3rd generation ( like our grand kids ) hopefully it should not be an issue since the 1st generation ( like us ) and 2nd generation ( like our kids ) might have built the necessary foundation for them to grow up naturally with all these qualities.

Did I sound too philosophical :)

you have mentioned everything very beautifully, thanks, however one aspect is at some point some generation may be 2nd 3rd or 4th will not do what their ealier one did(like having them in India till 15-16) and slowly the culture will vanish in future generations, I already see that happening with 2nd generations who are living in US they are already into mainstream USA culture

anandr2i · Post by **anandr2i** » Thu Jan 24, 2008 6:45 am

rk888;74933I am sure that my life will be much better in India. . I am not bothered about
pollution, corruption, gundagri...dadagiri..etc..in India.....for me those are secondary..... I can't live this lonely life anymore in US..... I will R2I in next couple of years..[/quote]

rk888,

Do you know if your loneliness is due to being in USA or due to your lack of friends in your neighborhood?

Your location is in NC and there are not so many Indians there, right? Could this be a reason for your loneliness?

desihometown · Post by **desihometown** » Thu Jan 24, 2008 6:45 am

dheeraj_handa;74998you have mentioned everything very beautifully, thanks, however one aspect is at some point some generation may be 2nd 3rd or 4th will not do what their ealier one did(like having them in India till 15-16) and slowly the culture will vanish in future generations, I already see that happening with 2nd generations who are living in US they are already into mainstream USA culture[/quote]

It would be a dis-service to those kids to not help them merge with the mainstream. You and I can hang out here for a few years and then run
away to India, where we feel at home w.r.t culture, language, and a general sense of belonging.

Wont the kids here want to do that as well ? I mean merge with the mainstream ? Do u want them to have a sense of isolation from the mainstream for the rest of their life ?

For us, R2I is always a option ? For them, India is some other country in this planet. Would you R2Fiji, just 'coz there are some desis there ?
Wont it be alien to us ?

Same deal. Be very careful with kids. Dont make them isolationist.

If you are so bothered that your culture and values will be lost forever if ur
kids are in US, then R2I asap and grow up ur kids there.

And, dont fret about 3rd gen and 4th gen. My goodness, how do u know
what will happen in 300 years ? It amazes me when people plan for their 4th gen :-)

Rajram · Post by **Rajram** » Thu Jan 24, 2008 9:31 am

rk888;74933I am sure that my life will be much better in India. . I am not bothered about
pollution, corruption, gundagri...dadagiri..etc..in India.....for me those are secondary..... I can't live this lonely life anymore in US..... I will R2I in next couple of years..[/quote]
Thats what I told myself, but inspite of you setting the lowest expectations or no expectations at all, India beats itself everyday on all the negatives you mentioned. Please remember that many people who R2I, given a choice to go back in time and change their decision, would never return to India. They force themselves into adjusting to Indian conditions because they dont want to look stupid by returning back as soon as they R2I. Think twice. Enjoy your lonliness, it is certainly better than the mess out here.