R2I is worth ANYTHING and EVERYTHING- US to Hyd

[Hyd ki]

Andariki na sastanga pranamalu. Its been an year since I am reading this forum. Its been quite useful in preparing the right mindset for the R2I, which, I believe, is vital for a more comfortable settle down in India.

I cannot describe my joy in words. I still cannot believe I am in India, in Hyderabad, in my own home, amidst my family, in typical hot summer, breathing outside air while sitting inside, I can go on and on and on.

I cannot believe I am writing a post in R2I DIARY. (This is not exactly a diary, please forgive me for that. I am only summarizing.) Several times, While I was in US, I was reading R2I posts in work and wondering when I am going to write one or if I ever could get a chance to write one.

By God's grace, I finally reached India with my son without any problem. I am a single mom, started raising my month's old son, doing full time job, without any family support, dealing CPS interrogations, police interrogations, battling court cases, paying $300 per hour lawyer bills. I did all these for 6years. I never guessed that in US, it requires only filling a form, to put a case. But for me to come out of those false cases, I lost everything- my peace of mind, health, money.

Checking email gives me butterflies in my stomach. If phone rings, my heart stops beating until I know that its not police. If anybody knocks my door, it has to be police for most of the time. Everything was a crime, or made out to be a crime. I could not believe that a mother has no credibility in raising a son, I was so tired of proving everyday that I was a good mother. Of course, this was only my experience, my perception. I faced all those with lot of balance, but I could never get used to those. I tried everything, going to vacations, distracting myself a lot, studying American family law, but I was not at peace. One thing helped me to sleep and to be centered, Art of Living. Also my job was very flexible, so that I could handle the rest of the things and get out of them.

A year Before I took this decision, I offered my ex everything that I could think of, to compensate for my son's being away. (when we got married, the bottomline was, we would settle in India. I was very very firm about that) In the last few months, I realized US courts might never allow relocation to India, as they see little difference between mother and step mother. Anyway, I dont want to explain more at this point. But I appreciate if you dont make wrong assumptions.

Enough of the sad part.

When I landed in Hyd, I hugged my cousins and managed not to cry. What all, I and my son missed in the last 6 yrs, got compensated in the last 40days. My son enjoyed the love and pampering of the whole family. We got in touch with all the family and visited most of them. I, in particular, attended all kinds of functions, engagement, marriage, Half saree, Odugu, Birthday. Every minute, I was thanking God for letting me part of all the wonderful moments.

My son got admission to grade II. He was in kindergarten in US. I was expecting lot of preparation for his interviews, but without any of that, he coolly got admitted into a good school. I was so relieved. He is already going from two weeks, he feels very hot inside the classroom. But tomorrow is his last day before summer vacation, so far he did pretty good. So I can say, our transition has already started.

At first I wanted to be in Hitech city, but I dont know when I will get a job. So I settled my son close to our own house.
-I slowly have to look for jobs.
-I am learning car driving now.
-I have to select designs for whole house for wood work (I wish I did it 4yrs ago, now the costs went up 3times more), select proper furniture, electronics.

some particular EXPERIENCEs:
-On Ugadi, Gangireddu (bull) guy came. My son was so ecstatic to see that, we took pictures. I gave him 11 rupees. He demanded 116, it was so difficult to send him away.
-I could not forget Jasmines from my garden, the first night I landed here. That smell took away all fears, calmed me instantly
-The school bus comes right to our house for pickup and drop off. I felt that as a luxury.
-Today is my second day of car driving. We went to busy narrow traffic, I was completely spaced out. I could not decide between changing the gears, cutting the cyclists, passing the autos or stopping for the on coming lorries. (I was driving our big gear car inside our colony very comfortably) I lost all my confidence.
-in a marriage function, in the dining hall, people are grabbing the chairs even though we were about to sit in them. You literally have to fight for your seat, otherwise you end waiting until they finish. It was little odd to me, but I thought thats how we were made this strong.
-I put all my jewelery in our family function. It was so fulfilling.
-After I am divorced, this is the first time, I participated in outside gatherings. But that did not bother me even a bit. Some talked about it, some sincerely advised me to remarry. Most of my experience is very positive, lot of people opined I should have come long back and told about their own experiences, which is good feeling. I could balance myself well in every situation. Thanks to the very hard training of American society.
-Right now, we are enjoying seasonal fruits, Mangos, Munjalu
-I ate almost all my favorite food, except peechu mithai, semya ice.
-Most important of all, I am enjoying IPL CRICKET MATCHES. I hope Deccan Chargers win tonight, but not easy with being Dhoni in CSK.

Anyway, I am the odd person out, I think, to see the worse side of American society. I thank all the experiences, they benefited me in one way or the other.

If you are thinking of R2Iing and are still debating, one advice. Just R2I. You will never regret it. Its not possible to write, HOW MUCH YOU (WE) ARE MISSING. But dont imagine a heaven here, problems are everywhere. Wherever you are, once you connect to the JOY inside you, that's it, nothing else is needed. In my case, R2I aided me a bit to find my joy. For me, R2I IS WORTH ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING.

That's all I can write for now. Sorry for posting it here, but it was my dream to write something in this section.

Admin, I might not write anything more, so if needed please move this to the appropriate section.

[My Roots]

Hyd Ki, you R2I'ed without our cake:)

Congrats, you did it and also made yourself to write a diary.
Wish you come out with flying colors from all your problems and start a new life.
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Posted as member

[My Roots]

Admin, I might not write anything more, so if needed please move this to the appropriate section.

Hyd ki, Diary don't have to be too personal infact I advice not to give too much personal details. You can just write about your job hunting process, how your kiddo is having blast with his grand parents, which new jewelery you plan to buy and the latest fashion in women apparel. This is my my suggestion but don't consider stopping with just one post if at all you can find some time to write here.

Anyways, I liked the putting on jewellay part which gives the fulfilment feeling. Isn't it the same thing when you wear nice saree too? I am least bothered about my dress while I am here but I get transformed into a different person when I go to India. I do exclusive shopping for India trips and my husband always laughs at me for this:)

Also you said your kiddo was in Kindergarten here but started 2nd grade there. Did schools allowed him? Didn't they asked for report cards?

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Posted as member

[venkat786]

> Wherever you are, once you connect to the JOY inside you, that's it, nothing else is needed.

Extraordinary sentence!!! CONGRATULATIONS on your R2I!!!

[our.r2i]

Dear Hyd ki, your post is so heartfelt. I am almost in tears.
One can see the worst side of the b'ful America only in dire circumstances. You faced the worst of it....but now it is over with God's grace and time to move on.
Wish you a very happy and successful r2i and luck for your job hunting!:)
(a big hug from me)

[Hyd ki]

I will definitely try.

Yep, I enjoyed wearing all my expensive sarees, which were worn only once.

My son should have been in grade I in US, but due to strict age limitations, he barely missed it. That's why, I think its acceptable to get him in Grade II here in India. Frankly I did not expect it, I was so thankful to God for that. I have his report card for the winter from US. School wanted a TC from US school, but I told about my situation and I did not hear back from them.

[rimjhim]

That's all I can write for now. Sorry for posting it here, but it was my dream to write something in this section.

Wooowwww.....How humble an individual can be? I just couldn't help smiling reading it...! :)

In your one post you have shown extraordinary positivity! God bless you! :)

There is one little section Women Hijack and Banter section! You can visit there sometimes whenever you feel like having casual chit chat! :)

[Vid_Bangalore]

OP,
That was a candid post! Thanks!
I too am into AOL..I am glad it helped you during your tough times..
Wish you good times ahead..
Also, I would second My_Roots in her advice against sharing too much of your personal details..

[GodblessIndia]

I second that!!..Its sounds simple, yet profound!...

Gud luck and god bless you.

> Wherever you are, once you connect to the JOY inside you, that's it, nothing else is needed.

Extraordinary sentence!!! CONGRATULATIONS on your R2I!!!

[rajubiztech]

Thanks for sharing.

Congratulations and good luck on your R2I.