Dilemma whether I should return to India or stay in US for some time

iceage1 · Post by **iceage1** » Wed Jul 21, 2010 3:14 am

Hello,

Currenly I am in dilemma whether I should return to India or stay in US for some time.

I came to US in 2006 for MS and after completing MS, I have been working for last 2.5 years. I never had any long term plans to stay in US but I wanted to make sure that I get some work experience and save some money.

Since my last India trip in November 09, my parents are asking me to come back and stay with them. My parents are about 68 and have common old age ailments nothing serious. But every time they tell me about some trouble they are having, I get home-sick and feel that I should be with them in India. I can see that they miss me a lot and want me to come back soon.

So I am now planning to return to India in around 6 months. By that time I will have 3 yrs of work ex and will have some savings (nothing comapred to ppl staying here for 10 yrs :)).

However, we always tend to see what our friends are doing and none of my friends are planning to return soon. They have plans to stay here for few more years. So that makes me think if I am returning too soon? On this forum as well, I see people returning only after 8 or 10 years.

My decision to go back is purely emotional for family reasons but I myself don't feel like I am loosing anything. I am 27 and I think that there is always option of coming back here in the future.

Have any of you have been in this situation before? Do you think my decision is correct?

Thanks

r2bangaloresoon · Post by **r2bangaloresoon** » Wed Jul 21, 2010 3:24 am

When you compare yourself to others you will find plenty of people who are not doing what you were about to do. So don't do comparison to others. Even for person who have stayed in US for 10 years +, when he looks around he can find many people who have not r2ied and than he might have same dilemma as you are having. If you think and wants to r2i..you do it..don't compare yourself to others.

krivan1 · Post by **krivan1** » Wed Jul 21, 2010 9:49 am

This is what you can do. Set aside 1 year as trial phase to test various options. During this time, you can search for job & see how it goes once you get it. You would have a tremendous satisfaction in serving the needs of your parents and at the same time free of any guilty feeling. Who knows you might click on the right opportunity and can do much better in India than in US at least financially. If you are single, should not have any second thoughts.

cool_r2i · Post by **cool_r2i** » Wed Jul 21, 2010 10:07 am

Do you have someone at home (your brother or sister) taking care of your parents? If no, the best decision is for you to return to India and take care of them. There are plenty of job opportunities for people with 3 years experience in India and salaries in India are increasing. Though the savings may not be as high as your counter parts in USA (again, it depends on many factors), you will be able to lead a decent life with your salary (I am assuming you are in IT field).

Sid · Post by **Sid** » Wed Jul 21, 2010 10:27 am

Are you the only child? Your parents sound a little old for your age. Regardless, you never know what opportunity lies ahead of you. If you haven't already seen, you should watch Steve Jobs' Stanford Commencement Speech. It can change your life and the way you think about it.

You are young, have a degree from US school... you can always come back at a later time on an H1. People with US degrees will always be more readily accepted, especially down the line when economy improves and when US has critical shortage of skilled workers. But meanwhile, in India you may grow rapidly. If you look at a lot of dilemmas posted in this forum, people with 12-15 year experience in US have greater trouble getting jobs, as getting in to middle management is getting tougher for R2Iers. So you may in fact be better off by moving to India earlier.

Also looking from a marriage perspective, it will be easier to get settled in India, without having to worry about H4 and other stupid immigration things...

my 2 cents...

iceage1 · Post by **iceage1** » Wed Jul 21, 2010 10:47 am

Thanks for the replies, they help a lot.

Just to answer few questions, I am single and in the IT field.

ind_lover · Post by **ind_lover** » Wed Jul 21, 2010 12:15 pm

Iceage 1-Maybe you should try coming back to India and be with your aging parents.Parents sacrifice so much for their kids education, life and future and at some point of time we need to pay back the same..Its better done when in need rather than sometime later and feel guilty.Even though there will be people around to help them out with day to day chores ,they will be emotionally and mentally isolated if their sons/daughters are not around at this age.Coming to think of it,what else do they need apart from spending time with their kids at this age.Nobody can fill this vacuum for sure except their offspring's. Do not comparer yourself with others financially or any other aspect.What works for one may not work for the other.Like your friends might have their siblings taking care of their parents.Moreover you have good educational background,so i guess you would fare good anywhere in the world.Take your time and think about it..but but involve your parents situation in the process too!
All the very best

Ind_lover