I get depressed when it comes to r2i.All doors are closed for me.Husband put his foot down and have no family back there too but the nostalgia is too strong..
long time back a poster advised in this thread that I might be suffering depression.
so I went to my GP who referred me to a counselor.I was given a melatonin for sleep and was told am might have mild anxiety but not depression.However,I was advised certain medications would help but not mandatory to take as of now.One of the highlights in my first session was I was told I was suffering from social media jealousy..
does hit me when I see people enjoying in India..
No idea why I am writing this in r2I forum..but thought to share..here am all alone,terrible winters,no family and friends but it seems all different in India..
life is so freaking robotic in America
social media jealousy related to R2I...
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Archana935
- Posts: 55
- Joined: Fri Jan 20, 2017 4:03 am
social media jealousy related to R2I...
why did you delete:)
I did read your reply and it was good.Can you recommend some good self help books?
I did read your reply and it was good.Can you recommend some good self help books?
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crazyforger
- Posts: 591
- Joined: Sun Mar 24, 2013 10:25 am
social media jealousy related to R2I...
Archana935;680806why did you delete:)
I did read your reply and it was good.Can you recommend some good self help books?
Try these
1. Beyond Wealth by Alexander Green
2. Seven habits of highly effective people by Stephen Covey
Remember that Indian lifestyle is just showoff.
Beneath that , most of them aren't really happy.
The ultimate goal is happiness....this happens only through knowledge and personal growth.
social media jealousy related to R2I...
You are not suffering from anything. Life in India IS more exciting, unlike the blandness here. Please stop taking all medication :( , you are falling into the trap of life here....
Sometimes I think the perennial festivals were created to keep us having a balance of work and life.
Sometimes I think the perennial festivals were created to keep us having a balance of work and life.
Archana935;680804I get depressed when it comes to r2i.All doors are closed for me.Husband put his foot down and have no family back there too but the nostalgia is too strong..
long time back a poster advised in this thread that I might be suffering depression.
so I went to my GP who referred me to a counselor.I was given a melatonin for sleep and was told am might have mild anxiety but not depression.However,I was advised certain medications would help but not mandatory to take as of now.One of the highlights in my first session was I was told I was suffering from social media jealousy..
does hit me when I see people enjoying in India..
No idea why I am writing this in r2I forum..but thought to share..here am all alone,terrible winters,no family and friends but it seems all different in India..
life is so freaking robotic in America
social media jealousy related to R2I...
Sorry to hear.
Probably, not depression yet. Try avoiding these anti-depressants. 3 hormones (serotonin (feeling good), oxytocin (bonding), dopamine (motivation) & endorphins). These quartets controls your mood. Anti-depressants primary job is to keep serotonin up (by inhibiting its uptake by receptors for breakdown). Once you get on this cycle, you will become dependent. You will not be yourself. And mostly makes you dull and less enthusiastic in life.
Since there is no objective evaluation for such illness, these drugs are major players by pharma companies for raking in tons of money. These are equivalent to cannabis etc. I can cite few books for you to read - how these games are played out especially the previous editors of DSM have exposed so many holes in it.
And as usual, doctors get 'cuts'.
So tread carefully.
It is easy to advise or suggest, but living in your shoes is difficult. You know the pain. We can't share.
One route:
Try bonding more with your husband. Spend time on outing. Even try striking conversations with strangers in decent restaurants. you may find something worthwhile. Try distracting with hobbies, job etc. Avoid Indian stuff for a while.
Another route:
Take a break for a month or so. Live in India. Face all the positives and negatives and then come to a conclusion.
In the end, we have to think for the future, what is that we are trying to accomplish. Humankind's main goal is to seek happiness and procreate. Whereever you can accomplish that, that you would be your choice.
But too much on hedonistic treadmill isn't good either.
Probably, not depression yet. Try avoiding these anti-depressants. 3 hormones (serotonin (feeling good), oxytocin (bonding), dopamine (motivation) & endorphins). These quartets controls your mood. Anti-depressants primary job is to keep serotonin up (by inhibiting its uptake by receptors for breakdown). Once you get on this cycle, you will become dependent. You will not be yourself. And mostly makes you dull and less enthusiastic in life.
Since there is no objective evaluation for such illness, these drugs are major players by pharma companies for raking in tons of money. These are equivalent to cannabis etc. I can cite few books for you to read - how these games are played out especially the previous editors of DSM have exposed so many holes in it.
And as usual, doctors get 'cuts'.
So tread carefully.
It is easy to advise or suggest, but living in your shoes is difficult. You know the pain. We can't share.
One route:
Try bonding more with your husband. Spend time on outing. Even try striking conversations with strangers in decent restaurants. you may find something worthwhile. Try distracting with hobbies, job etc. Avoid Indian stuff for a while.
Another route:
Take a break for a month or so. Live in India. Face all the positives and negatives and then come to a conclusion.
In the end, we have to think for the future, what is that we are trying to accomplish. Humankind's main goal is to seek happiness and procreate. Whereever you can accomplish that, that you would be your choice.
But too much on hedonistic treadmill isn't good either.
social media jealousy related to R2I...
We all are given certain circumstances and we have to learn to live within it and try to find happiness or keep our brain distracted to go through day to day.
Some one once told me that one can be happy all alone with no entertainment, because its a state of mind.
Its kind of impossible to practice but its true to some extent.
Unhappiness/non clinical depression is usually our brain getting bored and unable to do whatever it wants to do. In your case you are alone at home and dont have any challenges in India, and you see people in India having fun, your emotional brain(heart) wants to go to India since you have lots of mental stimulation and distractions which makes your brain feel not-bored/depressed.
Our brain is driven by motivations, and its always looking for whats next. After a while same old same old becomes boring and living in boring conditions leads to depression. This is kind of first world problem.
Unfortunately I dont know what will make your brain happy without you going to India......because it varies from person to person....I am still trying to figure out things I can do while I wait for my savings to reach a certain number which will lead to freedom..
I will write more about this later.....its kind of my pet research project.....trying to figure out what is that my brain wants and why is it no happy in first world conditions... I know for sure Indian stimulation and distractions are not long term solutions for me since day to day life itself is a mess over there for me....
Some one once told me that one can be happy all alone with no entertainment, because its a state of mind.
Its kind of impossible to practice but its true to some extent.
Unhappiness/non clinical depression is usually our brain getting bored and unable to do whatever it wants to do. In your case you are alone at home and dont have any challenges in India, and you see people in India having fun, your emotional brain(heart) wants to go to India since you have lots of mental stimulation and distractions which makes your brain feel not-bored/depressed.
Our brain is driven by motivations, and its always looking for whats next. After a while same old same old becomes boring and living in boring conditions leads to depression. This is kind of first world problem.
Unfortunately I dont know what will make your brain happy without you going to India......because it varies from person to person....I am still trying to figure out things I can do while I wait for my savings to reach a certain number which will lead to freedom..
I will write more about this later.....its kind of my pet research project.....trying to figure out what is that my brain wants and why is it no happy in first world conditions... I know for sure Indian stimulation and distractions are not long term solutions for me since day to day life itself is a mess over there for me....
Archana935;680804I get depressed when it comes to r2i.All doors are closed for me.Husband put his foot down and have no family back there too but the nostalgia is too strong..
long time back a poster advised in this thread that I might be suffering depression.
so I went to my GP who referred me to a counselor.I was given a melatonin for sleep and was told am might have mild anxiety but not depression.However,I was advised certain medications would help but not mandatory to take as of now.One of the highlights in my first session was I was told I was suffering from social media jealousy..
does hit me when I see people enjoying in India..
No idea why I am writing this in r2I forum..but thought to share..here am all alone,terrible winters,no family and friends but it seems all different in India..
life is so freaking robotic in America
social media jealousy related to R2I...
techynt;680814
I will write more about this later.....its kind of my pet research project.....trying to figure out what is that my brain wants and why is it no happy in first world conditions... I know for sure Indian stimulation and distractions are not long term solutions for me since day to day life itself is a mess over there for me....
Seriously, I think you should start a thread on those lines. It would be a good discussion if people decide to listen and exchange. I welcome it. :thup:
social media jealousy related to R2I...
Seems like we are getting there aren't we, the final frontier of functioning of the brain vs our perception of what we think is reality...and our feeling that what we feel right is reality.
This is already mentioned in BGeetha..... nothing is reality, its all a perception of our brain.....its all an illusion.
So all that matters is how do we manage ourselves in the middle of all these illusion for a balanced life, since the goal is to maintain this illusion until our power gets shutdown with the hope that maybe we will learn something we already dont know about our current universe...
This is already mentioned in BGeetha..... nothing is reality, its all a perception of our brain.....its all an illusion.
So all that matters is how do we manage ourselves in the middle of all these illusion for a balanced life, since the goal is to maintain this illusion until our power gets shutdown with the hope that maybe we will learn something we already dont know about our current universe...
drb;680815Seriously, I think you should start a thread on those lines. It would be a good discussion if people decide to listen and exchange. I welcome it. :thup:
social media jealousy related to R2I...
techynt;680818S......... is already mentioned in BGeetha..... nothing is reality, its all a perception of our brain.....its all an illusion.
....
I thought you were an atheist. Anyway, as you said, as long as we comprehend that we can't extrapolate beyond our sensory perceptions. Hence we started with animism, and so on without a clue to prove it. Hence an illusion or not is still unanswered, however these quandries maybe ephemeral. Who knows!
social media jealousy related to R2I...
I think getting involved in social/community services, volunteering etc. are great way to distract as well as achieve some kind of fulfillment, personal satisfaction.
Feeling appreciated is one of our basic needs. I dont know where it fits maslow thingy... but it is right there somewhere between feeling loved and self-actualization.
When you are going through daily chores, it becomes difficult to feel that you are being appreciated, or are really making any difference to someone's life. People around you start taking you for granted, that could be a spouse, co-worker, and it is not their fault. When you do volunteering or community service you see that immediate impact on a regular basis, depending on how often do it. Visiting to India is akin to that in some sense. You go to India and friends and family are happy to see and at some level you get a feeling that you are positively impacting their lives, though it is happening subconsciously but we get that fulfillment. But you know as well I do that that is only momentary. It is going to end. So please throw that out as a solution, and you dont have any choice in that matter anyway. So my two cents worth of advice, start volunteering, community service on a regular basis. You local food bank, habitat for humanity etc. would be great place to start AND while do that, resist the temptation take pics for fb/twtr/insta poison.
Feeling appreciated is one of our basic needs. I dont know where it fits maslow thingy... but it is right there somewhere between feeling loved and self-actualization.
When you are going through daily chores, it becomes difficult to feel that you are being appreciated, or are really making any difference to someone's life. People around you start taking you for granted, that could be a spouse, co-worker, and it is not their fault. When you do volunteering or community service you see that immediate impact on a regular basis, depending on how often do it. Visiting to India is akin to that in some sense. You go to India and friends and family are happy to see and at some level you get a feeling that you are positively impacting their lives, though it is happening subconsciously but we get that fulfillment. But you know as well I do that that is only momentary. It is going to end. So please throw that out as a solution, and you dont have any choice in that matter anyway. So my two cents worth of advice, start volunteering, community service on a regular basis. You local food bank, habitat for humanity etc. would be great place to start AND while do that, resist the temptation take pics for fb/twtr/insta poison.
drb;680815Seriously, I think you should start a thread on those lines. It would be a good discussion if people decide to listen and exchange. I welcome it. :thup: