Forgiveness at work

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venkat_at_tn
Posts: 13
Joined: Tue Jan 09, 2007 3:55 am

Forgiveness at work

Post by venkat_at_tn »

I get very easily provoked/angered at work...How many of how
feel like that, when others are not perfect...

can you pl. give me some suggestions, on how to become more patient
and non-judgmental towards your colleagues/boss ?

With tight deadlines , demanding manager and uncooperative
colleagues how do you manage...

I don't want to develop resentment towards others, even though
they are not perfect...
nand
Posts: 447
Joined: Thu Jan 25, 2007 6:38 am

Forgiveness at work

Post by nand »

1. believe in nishkama karma yoga - work without expectation to the rewards and just as if it is your duty
2. Do not get elated if someone pats you on your back and do not get disappointed if someone berates you
3. Always remember this is all transient, both in time and space. The earth is a tiny speck in space and we are a tiny speck on it. Our life span is a brief instant compared to eternity
4. take a deep breath every time you get angry and remember points 1-3 above, maybe you can write in an index card or tatoo it.
5. Be calm and deal/explain in non emotional terms to your coleagus who are not cooperating or your boss who is too demanding. Try to see their point of view and try to befriend them in non work situations. it can make a difference. You have to set expectations with your boss, that is critical and learn to talk back but not in angry words but with a straight face. Never fear the boss, this is where the next point will come in handy.
6. All of this is possible if you can detach yourself completely from your work, enjoy the moment and feel the passion allright, but never ever fear losing it. that is moksha. - most people deal with a lot of crap because of two reasons - one they fear losing their job and two they want to bend backwards and please in order to move up. You are free if you neither fear losing your job nor care for moving up!! easier said than done.
7. For points 1 and 6 credit goes to the bhagavad gita, the rest are copyrighted to me although I may have heard it somewhere :D:D
8. maximize the moment and forget the rest. this is like a batsman facing the ball and not the bowler.
9. This is not easy and I guarantee you that if you can master even 10% of this you will be successful. However these are easy to say and very difficult to practice. that is why we revere the buddha, mahavira and rahul dravid:p

p.s. I am saying this with some humor but I am actually serious and I at least try and practice this. I feel not much tension at work and home (both places I manage to irritate the boss and keep happy in just the right measure :p:p)
layman
Posts: 3928
Joined: Tue Jan 30, 2007 10:35 am

Forgiveness at work

Post by layman »

>>>>
demanding manager
>>>>
Boss is one important character in the whole game. Colleagues are secondary. If you feel you cannot get along well with your boss and if you feel the fault lies with your boss try to move to a different boss. Relationship with boss is very important.
>>>>
tight deadlines and uncooperative colleagues
>>>>
Try to be professional. Send status report severy day or every week. Use emails and written communication more than oral communication. Be clear in what you commit and deliver more and ahead of time. But, be careful before committing. Do not quarrel with any one and do not indulge in any activities other than work at office.

>>>
Regarding forgiveness
>>>>
Be a key player in the work area and help the colleagues when they need help. They will be grateful to you and will respect you.
desihometown
Posts: 314
Joined: Sat Feb 10, 2007 4:38 am

Forgiveness at work

Post by desihometown »

nand;406511. believe in nishkama karma yoga - work without expectation to the rewards and just as if it is your duty
2. Do not get elated if someone pats you on your back and do not get disappointed if someone berates you
3. Always remember this is all transient, both in time and space. The earth is a tiny speck in space and we are a tiny speck on it. Our life span is a brief instant compared to eternity
4. take a deep breath every time you get angry and remember points 1-3 above, maybe you can write in an index card or tatoo it.
5. Be calm and deal/explain in non emotional terms to your coleagus who are not cooperating or your boss who is too demanding. Try to see their point of view and try to befriend them in non work situations. it can make a difference. You have to set expectations with your boss, that is critical and learn to talk back but not in angry words but with a straight face. Never fear the boss, this is where the next point will come in handy.
6. All of this is possible if you can detach yourself completely from your work, enjoy the moment and feel the passion allright, but never ever fear losing it. that is moksha. - most people deal with a lot of crap because of two reasons - one they fear losing their job and two they want to bend backwards and please in order to move up. You are free if you neither fear losing your job nor care for moving up!! easier said than done.
7. For points 1 and 6 credit goes to the bhagavad gita, the rest are copyrighted to me although I may have heard it somewhere :D:D
8. maximize the moment and forget the rest. this is like a batsman facing the ball and not the bowler.
9. This is not easy and I guarantee you that if you can master even 10% of this you will be successful. However these are easy to say and very difficult to practice. that is why we revere the buddha, mahavira and rahul dravid:p

p.s. I am saying this with some humor but I am actually serious and I at least try and practice this. I feel not much tension at work and home (both places I manage to irritate the boss and keep happy in just the right measure :p:p)[/quote]

Awesome post.

One the trick that helps me get through is this. What is the worst that
this guy can do to me ? Kick me out of my job ? Think of what is the worst that can happen. If I have GC, I hang out at home for a few months and get a job. If I'm on H1, I'll go back to India. I can survive there.

So, the trick is to loose fear. Fear of everything. Fear of loosing job. Fear of what other people might think. When u cross over that mental barrier of loosing your job, nothing can tense you anymore.

Of course, if these guys are generally pissing you off, then it would help to change teams or change jobs. But you'll always meet bosses and colleagues who will piss you off. Just stay connected with those that dont piss you off. You'll realise very soon that the same guys that are pissing u off are
pissing the other nice guys in your team as well.

BTW, the free market is a great corrector of such attitudes. Your boss will know that if he pisses you off too much and you leave (and ur a good worker). he'll get screwed. Convey this to him subtlely.

Then, they wont piss you off as much. Just mention in passing that you keep getting calls for recruitment from your company's competitor and how you
are having a tough time resisting those calls and the reason you wont talk to them 'coz your boss and colleagues are such congenial people :-)

That should give them a hint that you are not a POPO (Passed On & Pissed Over).

Jai Hind.
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